The Ordinary Mystic

You might have heard such expressions as ‘finding your center’, ‘getting in touch with the real you’, or ‘finding your true self’. But what does that mean? And what does it feel like?

The concept of the true self is a fundamental one. It is crucial to the idea of being conscious, or awake - a state that sounds simple but is actually not easy to maintain for long periods of time.

In this post I’ll share a couple of exercises that might be helpful towards getting an idea of what the true self is. These are best done in a peaceful, quiet setting, free from interruptions, and they involve thoughtful introspection.

Exercise #1

This first exercise is actually a game of sorts that you might have played while exploring your own mind. Many children have a fascination with how their bodies work, what limitations there are, and what effects they can achieve. Ever see how red you could make your face while holding your breath? Remember how it felt when you found out that your knee cap could be moved around over your knee? Well, in the quietness of my own room at night, I would sometimes play a little game with my mind. It was the simple ‘thinking about what you’re thinking about’ game - a kind of recursive thinking, where you become conscious of the fact that you are thinking.

To begin, reflect on that fact that you are starting this exercise. Then reflect on the fact that you are thinking about starting the exercise. Then reflect on the fact that you are thinking about that you are thinking about starting the exercise … and on and on. Don’t try to keep track of how many levels you’ve accumulated - just focus on your current thought. It might help to visualize yourself observing the thought “I am starting the exercise”, then in your mind back up to notice what you just thought, then back up again to notice what you just did …

I used to think that it could make you crazy if practiced for too long a time, but now I believe it to be very beneficial to your self awareness.

As you practice this, try to figure out who is really doing the thinking. After awhile, you start to recognize the separation between the thinker and the thoughts. You become aware of your self.

Exercise #2

The second exercise involves recalling an experience you had when you were younger. The experience can be anything, but the more vivid, the better. Also, try to select a time when you were much younger, perhaps even when you were a child. These are your memories, your experiences. Now reflect on the fact that you were a much difference person back then - less experienced, perhaps naive. If someone observed you then, and compare that to the you that they see today, they would see two different people. Maybe you acted or reacted in a way that you would never do so today. Maybe you said things, felt things that you would never say or feel today. You looked different, talked differently, acted differently. In fact, you were a different person.

So if you were so different, how can you still recollect the experience as if it happened to you? What part of you is doing the remembering? What part of you is the same person that went through the original experience and is able to now view that experience as happening to you? Strip away all the differences between who you are now and who you were then, and there remains a core essence - a core witness - that connects the two expressions of yourself, and in fact has remained constant throughout your life.

This is the real you. It is not your body - your body changes. It is not your emotions - those change as well, over time. It is not your thoughts, for your mind is constantly changing. Such a realization can be very liberating, because once you develop this awareness, you can now see the true value of yourself - a value that has been there all along; a value that is independent of what you look like, how much money you have, or what skills you possess or don’t possess. Those are external things that you can control if you choose to, but that does not change what you are in the center of your being.

This awareness, which is actually just the tip of the iceberg, can be a springboard for other practices that I will cover in future posts, so have fun with these exercises and see where it takes you in your own journey in finding your true “you”.